The Bravery of Not Letting Fear Win

I recently got back from a four day trip to Orlando with my sister for a little pre-wedding weekend away. The weeks leading up to the trip, my anxiety flared big time due to outside circumstances and not taking care of myself the way I should have. I was having panicky sensations and to be honest, I wasn’t sure if I could handle this vacation. I imagined every worst case scenario and wondered if I would be okay. I was scared.

But even though having flare ups is a totally normal and expected process, we can never un-learn all the tools we’ve already gathered. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned (and now teach) about how to work with the fear that keeps us trapped and small, it’s that we have to keep pushing forward. We have to keep doing the things that scare us until they don’t scare us anymore. Continue reading

When You’re Really Hard on Yourself

I’ve spent most of my life being hard on myself. I’ve expected perfection from everything I do or say, and when I’ve fallen short, I often berate myself and drop into shame. When my anxiety turned me nonfunctional years ago, I noticed how awful I made myself feel for feeling awful. I was already experiencing difficulty and I chose to add even more unworthiness on top of that.

But I realized that, when I was kind to myself during a panic attack, the intense fear went away more quickly. When I sent myself love and compassion, the sensations of panic became easier to handle. Continue reading

The Choice of Peace

To be honest, the past few months have been challenging for me. Outside circumstances keep popping up and throwing me off and recently, something happened with family that caused me to question everything, and spiraled me into my old habits of anxiety and depression. I caught myself gripped in fear with worst-case scenarios and immobile with pessimism that things will never change or get better. I was walking around completely STUCK in my own misery. Continue reading

Meet Yourself Where You Are

If you follow me on Instagram, you may have seen that I’ve been struggling with some awful fatigue the past week or so. It’s the kind of exhaustion that makes it almost impossible to function, and this inability to do as much as I want has caused a lot of old fears to surface for me. Mainly, the fear of being lazy/ not accomplishing a lot/ not being worthy. Continue reading

Stopping the Comparison Game

I have to be honest, I can fall into the trap of comparing my life to others quite often. Social media and the little snippets of contrived goodness we see of others’ lives only makes it that much easier to think that others have it great, especially if we ourselves are struggling.

I remember when I was in the midst of panic disorder and completely nonfunctional, I would see other people doing simple things that I couldn’t do, like going out with friends or holding a steady job, and I would subsequently feel awful about myself. I would wonder why others had it so easy and I was barely making it through the day. I would get jealous and angry. Continue reading

Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You

It’s almost time for a new year! This shift and change can bring up a lot, especially if we aren’t where we feel we “should” be in our lives right now. But it’s also a really valuable time to take a look at what we can let go of and what doesn’t serve our growth anymore. We can use the new year as an opportunity to start fresh, no matter where we are in life and no matter how long we’ve been doing things a certain way. Continue reading